Mãe Ideal x Mãe Real

Às vezes eu me pergunto que tipo de Mãe sou eu. 
Ha algum tempo que tenho sentido como se estivesse falhando no meu papel de mãe e achando que não tenho direito nenhum de falhar, afinal não trabalho mais para me dedicar a criação dos filhos, certo?  Mais ou menos isso. 
A verdade e que ando mergulhada numa maré de estresse, de rotina, correria, um ciclo de comportamento não muito agradável tanto de minha parte quanto das crianças, que consome as minhas energias e me faz sentir cada vez mais incapaz. 

Nessa semana que passou, o Heitor adoeceu e eu também, o que só fez piorar toda a situação. 
E muito difícil conviver com as constantes críticas, que não necessariamente vem de pessoas próximas, pois na rua é possível ver os olhares, na internet, nas conversas. Aliás que tarefinha difícil essa de equilibrar as críticas alheias e as próprias cobranças e ainda achar as soluções!

Mas voltando, finalmente na sexta feira tive um tempo para mim, para pensar na vida e consegui enxergar alguns erros meus e as soluções. As vezes só o que precisamos é quebrar essa rotina e sair dessa maré para poder enxergar as situações com outros olhos.

Quando se tem só um filho o esquema e outro, sua casa se adapta para as estimulações necessárias para a idade em que seu filho se encontra, sobra tempo, tudo e novidade. Mas quando vem o segundo, a depender da diferença de idade tudo complica, porque aquela música é de  bebe, porque a brincadeira é de neném e sem graça e fica difícil ter tanto tempo para conciliar as tarefas e ai que eu me dei conta no quanto   estou deixando de estimular o meu mais novo em prol da mais velha, e por outro lado tentando compensar com algumas atitudes que geram ciúme na mais velha que resolve de todas as maneiras mostrar que existe (como se não demonstrássemos o nosso amor por ela).

Mas durante a minha tarde de reflexão pude ver o quanto estou mole e acomodada a uma rotina de obrigações, tarefas de casa e tv.  Por outro lado fico pensando se existem mesmo aquelas mulheres que são excelentes donas de casa, mães exemplares, que preparam uma lancheira super nutritiva todos os dias, fazem academia e ainda estão com os cabelos lindos e maquiadas quando buscam  os filhos  na  escola e  esperam  o marido  com o  sorriso mais  largo  do mundo  diariamente. Esse modelo de mãe ideal, como tantos outros e que nos fazem sentir as piores, atrapalhadas e que não conseguem dar conta de tarefas como sair de casa sozinha com dois filhos sem parecer uma maria louca.  

Então mais uma vez resolvi virar o jogo, sim porque não é a primeira vez que mudo a minha rotina visando o melhor para os nossos filhos, para que eles tenham experiências variadas ee melhor qualidade de vida. 
Acordei no fim de semana arrumei as crianças e fui  para praia, sozinha com os dois, ao  meio dia já tínhamos voltado pra casa, brincado um pouco  mais,  todos dois de  banho tomado e eu na cozinha preparando o almoço. Nesse momento me senti uma mãe competente, mas ciente de que alguém em algum lugar estaria me criticando por ter levado as crianças sem protetor solar ou sem um baldinho para brincar na areia. 
Repeti esse mesmo feito no domingo, e digo não e fácil, mas me senti feliz, no final do dia eu estava cansada depois de tantas tarefas. Apesar do intenso final de semana, vou começar a segunda com o coração leve de ter feito um pouco mais por eles.

E o que eu tiro disso tudo e que não existe mãe, mulher ideal. O ideal está no imaginário de alguém. O que eu quero ser para os meus filhos e uma mãe real, que chora, acorda descabelada, que comemora as conquistas, que se alegra, que briga, mas que eles tenham a certeza de que tiveram uma mãe que sempre pensou nos valores e bons sentimentos. 

E as nossas leitoras que são mães, ou querem ser, eu digo, vamos ser reais, para que nossos filhos cresçam sabendo que sua mãe foi a melhor que ele poderia ter.


Beijos 

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